So I’m doing a podcast! It’s called Off Campus, in which I interview people with PhDs from the humanities (or people who seriously pursued PhDs but ended up not completing their degrees for various reasons) who currently work in careers outside the academy (“alt-ac careers”). In each episode, I ask my guest a little…
Great book | Against White Feminism
I have read a few books/articles critiquing mainstream capitalist white lean-in feminism at this point. This book definitely ranks amongst the highest. The title might give off the impression that it’s a collection of problematic behaviors white women who claim to be feminists have engaged in, but the book is emphatically not that. In fact,…
It’s good to be back
1. I join a circle of friends in the hotel lobby. We haven’t seen each other in months, but it’s the first day of the conference and I am exhausted from travel. All I can do is mutter repeatedly, “it’s so good to see you; it’s really good to see you.” My friends smile and…
Things I cannot say | Minor Feelings
I recently finished the book Minor Feelings by Cathy Park Hong that my friend Jingyi has recommended to me. Here are some unorganized thoughts on it. When I read McMillan’s book Thick, there was one expression she used to describe something she read that stuck with me: I didn’t know this was allowed. This expression…
A reanalysis of an old episode
I know it’s been a while. Basically, I want to keep this blog <50% rant. And I felt like I was about 50%, so I didn’t want to post something ranty. Unfortunately, I didn’t have anything non-ranty to post. So I didn’t post. Today I’m writing about an epiphany I just had. You know how…
Waiting for permission
I recently graduated (yay!), which means I am in a long and sometimes painful process of handing over various service obligations to the very few people who, chances are, have already been disproportionally burdened. But this will not be a primarily ranty post; I promise. I have noticed a strange phenomenon lately. As is typical,…
Great book on writing | Air & Light & Time & Space
I’ve read quite a bit on writing — mostly articles and blog posts rather than books, because I’ve been very skeptical of the field of academic writing advice and did not want to invest a book’s worth of time. I am very glad that I read this book, though, as it has been an immensely…
Six years in retrospect
Alysha Kassam (same cohort as me) and I are the first two women of color ever graduating from my PhD program. I’ve always read about people being firsts and wondered what it’s like, which makes it a little surprising it took me this long to realize that I am one, too. I suppose one reason…
A ???? Story
The problem is that the anxieties never go away. Every capitulation to the “white gaze” comes with shame; every stand you take for authenticity triggers its own questions about what constitutes authenticity. And once you feel comfortable with the integrity of your work, someone says something that flips everything around, and you’re right back staring…
Nothing new under the sun
1. I decided to “do philosophy” when I got into my current PhD program. Shortly after this decision, I decided I should join a community of philosophers. For reasons explained before, I didn’t really have a community. Part of this was external, part of it was how I have a tendency to resist counting chickens…